Hey, hope everyone is well!
I'm going to be honest, the move is moving slower than expected. Between my knee acting up and work picking up, I haven't been able to move at the pace I wanted.
Another issue is the house in Greenwood. Richard's ex stepson lived with him to finish out the school year, and, well, left his old room an absolute wreck. Nothing is really salvagable, and so we have literally been taking huge trash bags and just throwing everything away. He moved out in May, and never came to get the rest of his stuff, so I don't see a point in hanging on to any of it. It's been a daunting task going through things, as we have to have both of the back bedrooms done by the end of this month. The other room is pretty much done, and after we dump everything that's in the closets, it will be ready to be inhabited. The other room, however, may require a hazmat suit to finish.
I guess I just don't understand how people can live in clutter. And I don't understand why people would just leave their clutter for someone else to deal with. Laziness? Lack of responsibility? Never held accountable for actions? I don't know, but I will be SO HAPPY when it is done, because we will never have to deal with that issue again!
The reason I say that is because a friend and former co-worker of mine reintroduced me to the FLY lady. Becca and I worked on a SubAcute unit for about a year together, and she always talked about following the rules of the FLY lady to help declutter her home, and would use some of the organizational stuff to help us have a system with the clients. It worked really well, and once I left the facility, I kind of forgot about it. About a week ago, she posted something on her Facebook, and I checked it out. It's amazing, and it's how I've decided I'm going to finish cleaning up the bedroom.
FLY lady stands for Finally Love Yourself. Her website is full of ideas to help you clean and declutter your home in small steps. The site is free to join, and you get several emails a day on various tricks and testimonials from other FLY members. It also has things about weight loss and everyday life. It's really neat, and I think an effective tool to help Richard and I not feel so overwhelmed about getting the rest of the house completed. It has come a long way from the beginning, but I can feel our motivation start to wane, because we have worked so hard to get the front of the house to look respectable. Once you get your home de-cluttered, there's several tips on how to keep the house picked up and not spend hours of your weekend doing it. Richard and I have started that (dishes right after dinner, sweeping nightly, etc.), and I think we enjoy being at home more because of it. I'll let you guys know how it goes. If anyone has any tips on house cleaning and decluttering, please share!
www.flylady.net
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Solemates
I love shoes. Not gonna lie.
When I was heavier, shoes were the one thing that constantly fit me. When my pants were too small, I got new shoes. It was my way of denying that I had an issue with my eating. My feet were a size 9 no matter how big my waistline got. That way I wouldn't loathe shopping trips with others, I knew I could always get a cute pair and still have bought something.
I did that 123 times.
I know, it's excessive. The sad thing? I wear the majority of them on a regular basis. The ones I don't wear are formal wear shoes, so I don't really count those. But still, that's a bit crazy. You name it I have it. I think Macy's shoe department is jealous, since I pretty much transplanted all their stuff into my closet. In my office, some of my clients refer to me as "the counselor with the cool shoes." I've lost my identity!
So imagine my sadness when I was told yesterday that my cute pumps and wedges that I have been wearing are to stay in their boxes for 10 days. 10. Long. Days! My knee that I had surgery on a few years ago is acting up again, and my doctor said I have tendonitis. For the next 10 days, I can't do yoga or pilates (which I do 2-3 times a week) run (which I do when it's not so hot), climb stairs or lift boxes (which is hampering the move, since all that is left is the bigger stuff)....and no heels.
It's like I've abandoned a good friend. Ok, that's a bit dramatic. I know it's for the best for me in the long term. The last thing I want is to mess my knee up and have another surgery....the last one was a big enough ordeal. In all seriousness, I had gotten into a great routine with my workouts, and miss the fact that I can't do them for the time being. I fear in 10 days I will gain a lot of weight, which I know is psychological, and I can get past those thoughts pretty quickly. I just feel so much better and relaxed after going to those classes, and I've been making a few acquaintances, which has been nice. And I measure how well I am doing in my workouts by...you guessed it...wearing heels. If my feet hurt after being on my feet only a few hours, I know I need to step it up in the gym. It's also how I knew my knee was out of whack again. They are like my WebMD (some may say my drug of choice, whatever). But it was my way of knowing that I was being successful at keeping the weight off. It's weird. Some people count calories, I wear heels. Like I said in an earlier post, shopping is my new comfort food, and even though I can wear a smaller size, the shoes are the first things I look at. It's an old, comfortable habit.
What are some of your comfortable habits? How have you handled not being able to do that habit for a period of time? Let me know!
When I was heavier, shoes were the one thing that constantly fit me. When my pants were too small, I got new shoes. It was my way of denying that I had an issue with my eating. My feet were a size 9 no matter how big my waistline got. That way I wouldn't loathe shopping trips with others, I knew I could always get a cute pair and still have bought something.
I did that 123 times.
I know, it's excessive. The sad thing? I wear the majority of them on a regular basis. The ones I don't wear are formal wear shoes, so I don't really count those. But still, that's a bit crazy. You name it I have it. I think Macy's shoe department is jealous, since I pretty much transplanted all their stuff into my closet. In my office, some of my clients refer to me as "the counselor with the cool shoes." I've lost my identity!
So imagine my sadness when I was told yesterday that my cute pumps and wedges that I have been wearing are to stay in their boxes for 10 days. 10. Long. Days! My knee that I had surgery on a few years ago is acting up again, and my doctor said I have tendonitis. For the next 10 days, I can't do yoga or pilates (which I do 2-3 times a week) run (which I do when it's not so hot), climb stairs or lift boxes (which is hampering the move, since all that is left is the bigger stuff)....and no heels.
It's like I've abandoned a good friend. Ok, that's a bit dramatic. I know it's for the best for me in the long term. The last thing I want is to mess my knee up and have another surgery....the last one was a big enough ordeal. In all seriousness, I had gotten into a great routine with my workouts, and miss the fact that I can't do them for the time being. I fear in 10 days I will gain a lot of weight, which I know is psychological, and I can get past those thoughts pretty quickly. I just feel so much better and relaxed after going to those classes, and I've been making a few acquaintances, which has been nice. And I measure how well I am doing in my workouts by...you guessed it...wearing heels. If my feet hurt after being on my feet only a few hours, I know I need to step it up in the gym. It's also how I knew my knee was out of whack again. They are like my WebMD (some may say my drug of choice, whatever). But it was my way of knowing that I was being successful at keeping the weight off. It's weird. Some people count calories, I wear heels. Like I said in an earlier post, shopping is my new comfort food, and even though I can wear a smaller size, the shoes are the first things I look at. It's an old, comfortable habit.
What are some of your comfortable habits? How have you handled not being able to do that habit for a period of time? Let me know!
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Stay At Home Dads?
Short post today! I have a link below to an article I read on msnbc.com about the reversal of roles due to the economy, and how that can help or hinder a marriage. It does a great job of discussing both sides of the issue, and brings up a good discussion...is it something that you would be ok doing? Would you prefer to be or have your significant other be a househusband, or not? Why? Read the article and let me know!
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/38628278/ns/today-parenting/
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/38628278/ns/today-parenting/
Monday, August 9, 2010
Quirks
I'm tired today, and that makes me somewhat cranky. Instead of it being a full-blown crankiness, I call it a funny cranky. I'm irritated and grumpy, but I can still see the humor in things.
One thing that I notice more when I am in this mood is other people's quirks, and am REALLY aware of mine. I have a pet peeve that all of my labels have to face forward. One of my friends likes to go through my kitchen and bathroom and mess all of my labels up before she leaves. I know it's her way of picking on me out of love, and now it's a competition to see how long it takes me to notice what is messed up (have I mentioned I'm competitive and a perfectionist?)
The reason I mention this is because my fiance has a lot of quirks....LOTS. We have recently moved in together after being in a long distance relationship for a year and a half. We went from spending maybe 10 hours a week together, to seeing each other every day. I was worried that we might get on each others' nerves in the early stages of cohabitation. Honestly, I was really worried his little tics might make me put a pillow over his face while he slept (just kidding..somewhat). He drinks his milk out of a vase (in his defense it does look like a large glass; but once I pointed out to him that Better Homes and Gardens does not make glassware, he continued to drink out of it), he has an inability to stand still, and he will continue to do something when he knows it annoys you (like wax poetic about the awesomeness of Taylor Swift's music..ugh).
If it were anyone else, I would have wanted to change these little idiosyncracies, or restrict his behavior. Instead, I love him more because of his quirks. We are far removed from the "aww, he has such a cute snore when he sleeps" stage in our relationship, and I think he knows deep down these little habits make him more endearing to me. It makes me laugh in spite of myself when I see him come out of the kitchen with his equally numbered Oreos and obnoxiously large red vase/glass, or when he says the most random things with sincerity and honesty ("Let's honeymoon in Hollywood!" "We should have a saloon themed wedding with a Skittles color scheme!"), that make me realize that he is it for me.
I think that's what is missing from relationships: accepting them out of love, not out of convenience. I see Richard for who he is, and love those characteristics about him, and he sees a neurotic, anxious perfectionist, and is okay with it. It's how I know it's the real thing, and for the first time, it makes me feel safe and complete :) Mushy but true.
What about you? Do you or your significant other have any quirks? Is it endearing or obnoxious? Let me know!
One thing that I notice more when I am in this mood is other people's quirks, and am REALLY aware of mine. I have a pet peeve that all of my labels have to face forward. One of my friends likes to go through my kitchen and bathroom and mess all of my labels up before she leaves. I know it's her way of picking on me out of love, and now it's a competition to see how long it takes me to notice what is messed up (have I mentioned I'm competitive and a perfectionist?)
The reason I mention this is because my fiance has a lot of quirks....LOTS. We have recently moved in together after being in a long distance relationship for a year and a half. We went from spending maybe 10 hours a week together, to seeing each other every day. I was worried that we might get on each others' nerves in the early stages of cohabitation. Honestly, I was really worried his little tics might make me put a pillow over his face while he slept (just kidding..somewhat). He drinks his milk out of a vase (in his defense it does look like a large glass; but once I pointed out to him that Better Homes and Gardens does not make glassware, he continued to drink out of it), he has an inability to stand still, and he will continue to do something when he knows it annoys you (like wax poetic about the awesomeness of Taylor Swift's music..ugh).
If it were anyone else, I would have wanted to change these little idiosyncracies, or restrict his behavior. Instead, I love him more because of his quirks. We are far removed from the "aww, he has such a cute snore when he sleeps" stage in our relationship, and I think he knows deep down these little habits make him more endearing to me. It makes me laugh in spite of myself when I see him come out of the kitchen with his equally numbered Oreos and obnoxiously large red vase/glass, or when he says the most random things with sincerity and honesty ("Let's honeymoon in Hollywood!" "We should have a saloon themed wedding with a Skittles color scheme!"), that make me realize that he is it for me.
I think that's what is missing from relationships: accepting them out of love, not out of convenience. I see Richard for who he is, and love those characteristics about him, and he sees a neurotic, anxious perfectionist, and is okay with it. It's how I know it's the real thing, and for the first time, it makes me feel safe and complete :) Mushy but true.
What about you? Do you or your significant other have any quirks? Is it endearing or obnoxious? Let me know!
Sunday, August 8, 2010
The Dress
I hope everyone is having a good weekend! I hurt my knee working out, so Richard is making me take it easy today. Obviously, I am not complaining.
Yesterday my mom, her best friend Kim, and her daughter Jennifer drove up to see the progress we have made on the house, and to shop for a wedding dress. I have been pouring over bridal magazines since we became engaged, so I admit I am kind of to the point of every dress looking the same: white with some beading.
To help make this process go a bit smoother, I have made my own wedding planner, and narrowed it down to dresses by cut, price range, etc. (it was my OCD kicking in.) Yesterday when we went to the bridal shop, it was effortless for the consultant to get what I had. There was one dress that I had found in their catalog, but I wanted to make sure my mom was there for me to try it on. I also tried on the dresses one of my coworkers, my maid of honor Jennifer, and my future stepdaughter had picked out for me. I told my mom that I would know it was the dress if it made her cry (she claims she has never heard of this before, I think I'm just watching too many wedding shows).
The first dress that my coworker picked out was a hit. It was a fit and flare and had applique flowers along the skirt and the train. My judges as I called them all liked it. The next few were quickly put in the no pile, and a few we were split on.
That ended when I put the last dress on, which is the one that I had picked out in the catalog. As soon as I walked out, my Mom's eyes said it all.
And she started to cry. I knew it was the one. End of story. The dress is gorgeous. It's everything I wanted. My two goals were to not look like a princess or a cake topper, and I have successfully made that goal.
I finally feel like the wedding stuff is starting to come together. Getting a dress was a big first step. We are looking at the venue that we want in a few weeks. Now I can look at bridesmaid dresses, and get the flowers, etc. Before I started dating Richard I was always nervous how I would handle a wedding with my cast of characters in my family. But now, it doesn't matter. All that matters is that I begin my life with someone who compliments me, who makes me laugh, and has my best interest at heart, and that I feel the same about him. Ahhh, love :)
Yesterday my mom, her best friend Kim, and her daughter Jennifer drove up to see the progress we have made on the house, and to shop for a wedding dress. I have been pouring over bridal magazines since we became engaged, so I admit I am kind of to the point of every dress looking the same: white with some beading.
To help make this process go a bit smoother, I have made my own wedding planner, and narrowed it down to dresses by cut, price range, etc. (it was my OCD kicking in.) Yesterday when we went to the bridal shop, it was effortless for the consultant to get what I had. There was one dress that I had found in their catalog, but I wanted to make sure my mom was there for me to try it on. I also tried on the dresses one of my coworkers, my maid of honor Jennifer, and my future stepdaughter had picked out for me. I told my mom that I would know it was the dress if it made her cry (she claims she has never heard of this before, I think I'm just watching too many wedding shows).
The first dress that my coworker picked out was a hit. It was a fit and flare and had applique flowers along the skirt and the train. My judges as I called them all liked it. The next few were quickly put in the no pile, and a few we were split on.
That ended when I put the last dress on, which is the one that I had picked out in the catalog. As soon as I walked out, my Mom's eyes said it all.
And she started to cry. I knew it was the one. End of story. The dress is gorgeous. It's everything I wanted. My two goals were to not look like a princess or a cake topper, and I have successfully made that goal.
I finally feel like the wedding stuff is starting to come together. Getting a dress was a big first step. We are looking at the venue that we want in a few weeks. Now I can look at bridesmaid dresses, and get the flowers, etc. Before I started dating Richard I was always nervous how I would handle a wedding with my cast of characters in my family. But now, it doesn't matter. All that matters is that I begin my life with someone who compliments me, who makes me laugh, and has my best interest at heart, and that I feel the same about him. Ahhh, love :)
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Wasted
As many of you know, I have been moving from Terre Haute to Greenwood. I took a few weeks off, and spent part of that time just going through stuff.
I have a lot of stuff.
It's not just a lot of one thing, like a lot of books, or clothes, or shoes. I have a lot of those things and more.
I have a few theories of how I have accumulated this stuff. One, I have lived in the same place for nearly 10 years. So I've had lots of time to add to my various collections and not really notice it. Secondly, I have lost a lot of weight, and have had to buy smaller clothes, and never really got rid of the bigger things simultaneously. Finally, I buy stuff when I'm stressed, unhappy, happy, etc. It used to be I would eat, but since my pouch (bariatric term for your post-op stomach) just doesn't hold what it used to, I turned from that to just getting stuff.
I would like to clarify that I'm not a hoarder. All of my stuff has a place, and I know where (mostly) everything is. I just had no idea how much I had accumulated, and how much of it is wasted.
That's right. Wasted. Waste of space, money, and so on. I have things that I swore would be a great purchase, and ended up being in the back of a closet or cupboard, never to be used. It boggles me how many boxes of clothes, shoes, food, and toiletries that I never even touched, and resulted in going bad, out of style, and out to the trash. Some of my friends have benefitted from the closet purge, and that's a great feeling that those clothes will be used again. But I was ashamed at the amount of things that went into the trash!
This has led me to have a new rule: I have to use what I have. No more of going to the store and buying an item to come home and realize it was hiding in the back of the fridge. I am keeping Richard and myself to go to the store once a week, and to only buy the amount of food that we will need for the week, and that's it. No more, no less. I have also really tried to pare down my clothes, as my closet space has diminished greatly. If it's my size and I hadn't worn it, it was out. Same with my makeup and toiletries. I had 5 BAGS full of makeup. I love cosmetics, but you can only wear so much makeup on your face at a time and not look like a clown. I still have enough makeup to where I won't need to buy eyeshadow or lipstick for a year.
Pretty much it's a need vs. want situation. If I want it because I'm in a blah mood, then I'm going to get myself back into this vicious cycle, and that's not an option for me.
To help with that, I have decided that whenever I successfully don't purchase something that's a want, that money will go into a jar. Once I get so much, I will either save it for the wedding, or do a splurge (like a massage, pedicure, etc.) I don't believe in depriving yourself, so if you do something nice for yourself when you reach your goal, it's worth it.
I believe that this Purge has been helpful. For one, it has helped me see how much progress I have made with my weight loss. I hesitate to use the term "success" since you have to have kept the weight off for five years to be considered a successful case in the bariatric world. It has helped me see how my mood affects me, both monitarily and space wise. It has also made me feel like I am de-cluttering a lot of things symbolically, as well. It's putting me in a better place mentally, which has been noticed by friends and co-workers, who have made comments that I just look and act like I'm happier. I'm sure being done with school has something to do with it, but every time I go to the apartment I look at the progress that has been made, and how this new stage of life is scary but exciting at the same time. I thought I would be a wreck moving out of the apartment, but it's been pretty smooth so far. I hope it stays that way.
Anyone else realize how much "waste" is in their life? How are you handling it? Sticking to your goals? How? I would love to hear your strategies/tips!
I have a lot of stuff.
It's not just a lot of one thing, like a lot of books, or clothes, or shoes. I have a lot of those things and more.
I have a few theories of how I have accumulated this stuff. One, I have lived in the same place for nearly 10 years. So I've had lots of time to add to my various collections and not really notice it. Secondly, I have lost a lot of weight, and have had to buy smaller clothes, and never really got rid of the bigger things simultaneously. Finally, I buy stuff when I'm stressed, unhappy, happy, etc. It used to be I would eat, but since my pouch (bariatric term for your post-op stomach) just doesn't hold what it used to, I turned from that to just getting stuff.
I would like to clarify that I'm not a hoarder. All of my stuff has a place, and I know where (mostly) everything is. I just had no idea how much I had accumulated, and how much of it is wasted.
That's right. Wasted. Waste of space, money, and so on. I have things that I swore would be a great purchase, and ended up being in the back of a closet or cupboard, never to be used. It boggles me how many boxes of clothes, shoes, food, and toiletries that I never even touched, and resulted in going bad, out of style, and out to the trash. Some of my friends have benefitted from the closet purge, and that's a great feeling that those clothes will be used again. But I was ashamed at the amount of things that went into the trash!
This has led me to have a new rule: I have to use what I have. No more of going to the store and buying an item to come home and realize it was hiding in the back of the fridge. I am keeping Richard and myself to go to the store once a week, and to only buy the amount of food that we will need for the week, and that's it. No more, no less. I have also really tried to pare down my clothes, as my closet space has diminished greatly. If it's my size and I hadn't worn it, it was out. Same with my makeup and toiletries. I had 5 BAGS full of makeup. I love cosmetics, but you can only wear so much makeup on your face at a time and not look like a clown. I still have enough makeup to where I won't need to buy eyeshadow or lipstick for a year.
Pretty much it's a need vs. want situation. If I want it because I'm in a blah mood, then I'm going to get myself back into this vicious cycle, and that's not an option for me.
To help with that, I have decided that whenever I successfully don't purchase something that's a want, that money will go into a jar. Once I get so much, I will either save it for the wedding, or do a splurge (like a massage, pedicure, etc.) I don't believe in depriving yourself, so if you do something nice for yourself when you reach your goal, it's worth it.
I believe that this Purge has been helpful. For one, it has helped me see how much progress I have made with my weight loss. I hesitate to use the term "success" since you have to have kept the weight off for five years to be considered a successful case in the bariatric world. It has helped me see how my mood affects me, both monitarily and space wise. It has also made me feel like I am de-cluttering a lot of things symbolically, as well. It's putting me in a better place mentally, which has been noticed by friends and co-workers, who have made comments that I just look and act like I'm happier. I'm sure being done with school has something to do with it, but every time I go to the apartment I look at the progress that has been made, and how this new stage of life is scary but exciting at the same time. I thought I would be a wreck moving out of the apartment, but it's been pretty smooth so far. I hope it stays that way.
Anyone else realize how much "waste" is in their life? How are you handling it? Sticking to your goals? How? I would love to hear your strategies/tips!
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
New Beginnings
Hello! If you want to know more about me, check out my about me section. Or ask, I'm pretty open.
I decided to start a blog for several reasons. Apparently I've had this idea before, as I had set up this account a while ago and had forgotten about it. But this time I have decided to try to stick with it. I feel it's more pertinent now.
Why, you ask? Well, I am starting a lot of new beginnings. I have lost 140 pounds in the past 18 months, and I recently completed my Master's degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling (fancy term for I'm a therapist), and now have free time that I don't quite know what to with. I have also moved to Indianapolis (well, Greenwood) with my fiance, and we are in the early stages of planning a wedding. I figured with the move and the wedding, this would be a great way for me to keep my family and friends updated on how things are on a regular basis, since we are kind of all over the place now. I also just find writing relaxing (I know, weird).
I figured that this would be a life blog. I don't plan on writing strictly about one thing. I'm organized and scattered all at the same time, so my blog should reflect that, right? Hopefully it will hit on a little bit of everything for readers can enjoy. I would enjoy suggestions and feedback! Enjoy!
I decided to start a blog for several reasons. Apparently I've had this idea before, as I had set up this account a while ago and had forgotten about it. But this time I have decided to try to stick with it. I feel it's more pertinent now.
Why, you ask? Well, I am starting a lot of new beginnings. I have lost 140 pounds in the past 18 months, and I recently completed my Master's degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling (fancy term for I'm a therapist), and now have free time that I don't quite know what to with. I have also moved to Indianapolis (well, Greenwood) with my fiance, and we are in the early stages of planning a wedding. I figured with the move and the wedding, this would be a great way for me to keep my family and friends updated on how things are on a regular basis, since we are kind of all over the place now. I also just find writing relaxing (I know, weird).
I figured that this would be a life blog. I don't plan on writing strictly about one thing. I'm organized and scattered all at the same time, so my blog should reflect that, right? Hopefully it will hit on a little bit of everything for readers can enjoy. I would enjoy suggestions and feedback! Enjoy!
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